Tuesday, June 12, 2012

It Sucks So Good

I already told you that I collect a lot of stuff— Gone With The Wind plates, figurines, Barbie’s, mugs, etc., and then I have Barbie Lenox and ornaments, and lions, oh my do I have lions! As a matter of fact, I just purchased a new quilt for my bed and decided that my bed needed a break, so I packed away all the stuff lions that were on my bed—all except for Zeus, my build-a-bear lion with two hearts, which was a gift from my sons one year for Christmas (It goes without saying, but I’m going to say it anyway, Zeus is my favorite).

Since I abhor clutter, I’m not a hoarder, but an organized pack-rat, and my things are properly and proudly displayed around my home. As soon as you enter you can decipher from how I decorate as to what I love the most—pictures of my family, my collectibles, lots of books, dog hair…

Which is why, as of Sunday, I am officially a vacuum cleaner collector; I now have four vacuum cleaners and one shop vac.

 Sunday, on my way home from my nephew’s Eagle Scout ceremony, I stopped at Wal-Mart because I needed laundry soap and fabric softener. I came home with laundry soap, fabric softener and a Eureka Suction Seal vacuum cleaner.

Why did I do this when I already had three? Well, don’t let me leave you on pins and needles!

 I’m a vacuum cleaner nut. Over the years I’ve owned a Kirby and a Rainbow, both of which were fantastic. The Kirby was kinda heavy though, so I purchased a Hoover WindTunnel Self-Propelled Bagged Upright Vacuum for in between sweeping. I still have it. It’s been a good vacuum, but it takes bags and is now pretty beat. So, it’s in my garage with my shop vac. I use that Hoover to vacuum the vehicles and for small dry messes in the garage and the shop vac is for large and wet messes.

When the Kirby went to that big vacuum in the sky, I got a Rainbow. Now THAT was a great vacuum. It’s also fantastic for people who have allergies (like my husband) plus it vacuums dry and wet messes! It has some great suction too! The only drawback was the canister design. It was a pain to lug around, hence why I purchased a Hoover Windtunnel Self-Propelled Bagless Upright Vacuum. That Hoover is in my closet for easy access if I want to vacuum on a moment’s notice rather than go downstairs to get the Dyson.

I got a Dyson when the Rainbow went to that big vacuum in the sky. I believe it’s seven years old now. It still works fairly well but my husband doesn’t even want to discuss new vacuum cleaners; he LOVES that Dyson. I like it too, but since mine is older I have the stupid attachment-wand design in which I have to pull the handle/wand out of the back of the vacuum, then pull it out of the hose and then turn it around and reattach it on the opposite end, which is a total pain in my ass, plus I could break a nail! The Hoovers, however, are easy-peasy. Pull the hose off the back of the vacuum, slip on the length wand you want and add the brush—voila, you’re ready to go, without breaking a nail or working up a sweat.

I’ve wanted a new vacuum for a little while now and have been contemplating a new Dyson, especially since they redesigned the attachment wand. Then I saw the advertisement for the Eureka Suction Seal that said it was supposed to work just as well as the Dyson for half the price. 

 Well, at Wal-Mart, it was more than half. There the Dyson was priced at four hundred dollars and the Eureka was on sale for one hundred thirty-four dollars. I thought it was a good deal, especially if it performs like the Dyson. Since there was only one way to find out, I bought it. 

 Before I left the parking lot, I called home to let David know I bought a new vacuum. “Hello,” David answered sounding miserable. 

“What’s wrong?” I asked since I heard the dickey tone in his voice. 

“Work stuff.” I knew what he meant. Those two words used to haunt me day and night when I was in Corporate. I didn’t miss those days one bit. 

“Oh. I guess now isn’t the time to tell you I bought a new vacuum cleaner then.” I wanted to lighten his mood and what better way than to give his precious Dyson some competition. 

“What’s wrong with my Dyson?” His tone changed from dickey to rascally. 

“It’s old and this Eureka is supposed to be just as good and it cost way less than the Dyson.” I knew he wouldn’t comprehend my justification but I gave it a go anyway. 

“We don’t need another sweeper.” 

 “I gotta go, see you in a few!”  I didn’t want to discuss it on a cell phone while driving. I only wanted to give him a warning. Otherwise he would’ve been shocked when he went to unload the Jeep and saw a vacuum cleaner box! 

Once home, David had Austin assemble the Eureka and then I tried it out. WOW! It was a sucker! David had used the Dyson in the afternoon and the Eureka picked up more…um…stuff. Ew and yuk. David said it’s because the Dyson’s brushes and rollers need cleaned. I didn’t argue with him, even though I think it’s older than dirt (no pun) and it just doesn’t work as well as a new one anymore. I suggested a suck off instead.

 I sat on the floor with my eyes closed as he put a hose on each one of my open palms so I could judge which vacuum sucked the best. I picked my left hand, which happened to be the Eureka. David wasn’t satisfied, so I did the suck test on his hands; he chose the Dyson. 

 It was a tie. 

We got Austin for the tie breaker. He sat with his eyes closed and palms open facing the ceiling. I held the Eureka hose while David held his precious Dyson hose as if any second someone was going to steal it out of his hands. We each touched our hoses to Austin’s palms for a few seconds until Austin announced “My right hand” which happened to be…the Dyson. 


David won, and I admitted it, but I’m KEEPING the Eureka. It’s MY vacuum and it’s going right in my closet. I love how easy the attachments are, how light it is, and how awesome it sucks

 Now I should probably get rid of one of the older Hoovers. I really don’t need four vacuums. It’s not like my family is going to be vacuuming all at the same time and we’ll each need our own vacuum cleaner. Plus, I don’t want to be known as the Vacuum Lady. That’s a lot weirder different than the Cat or Dog Lady. People can understand cats and dogs, vacuums, not so much. Besides, I know quite a few people who collect kitchen gadgets. I’ve never heard of anyone collecting vacuum cleaners. 

Or irons… 

I have four of those too—


  1. *grin* I so loved this!!! My now-5-year-old was OBSESSED with vacuums just after he turned 2. We literally could not set foot in a store selling such treats w/out planning on spending a good hour gawking at them inappropriately. We finally bought him one of those little toy-sized uprights with a detachable dust-buster ( less than 5 months later, we found ourselves holding a funeral for the darn thing)! He additionally thought I was royalty when I had to conduct extensive research for one of our janitorial contracts (at a Federal building) through every alliance, association, union and fan club known to carpet cleaners far and wide (I say this to remember the quite possibly one time my son will ever view me as the superhero I clearly am)! I was, frankly, dazzled so many organizations existed in this field! 
    Well I must say CONGRATULATIONS on the new member of your family! Hey, I don't see anything wrong with the collection as I fully believe each has its own awesome responsibility on this planet. If anything, David should be taking you out to celebrate the newly acquired bargain, yes? :D 

  2. Pam, you had me falling off my chair, laughing!!!!

    " I suggested a suck off instead."

    Bwhahahahahahaahahaha! That totally caught me off guard and made me HOWL!

    Okay, here's another thing you and I have in common...

    "I’m a vacuum cleaner nut"

    Meeeeeeeeeee too! However, I'm not a vacuum cleaner nut when it comes to buying lots of vacuum cleaners. I'm more a vacuum cleaner nut when it comes to habitually vacuuming EVERYDAY! I can't stand to see lint or particles of things lying on the area rug or hardwood floors. I like them immaculate! Kinda like Joan Crawford!

    Also, I too own a Eureka and I ADORE it! It's truly the best vacuum cleaner I've ever had. I remember when I was a kid, that a Eureka was 'the' most expensive and sought after vacuum cleaner. If you had a Eureka that meant you were RICH!

    Anyway, congrats on your new EUREKA!

    And happy sucking!

    Fab post!!!!!!

    ((( You )))

  3. Annie,  Your little one being obsessed with vacuums is adorable! My youngest (now 15) used to read all the manuals or watch the operating CD's on every electronic device! It was very helpful...now I have to do it-- he's just not interested. Although he DID assemble the Eureka! lol.

    I think David should take me out to celebrate too. The Eureka won't eat us out of house and home, or eat our HOME (see my next post!).


  4. Ron, when I was posting this, I was wondering if you were a vacuum nut! Seriously! Considering we are so a-like! 

    OMG! Joan Crawford! I have ALL plastic hangers! 

    This is my FIRST Eureka. Other than the Kirby and Rainbow, I've had all Hoovers. So far, I really like the Eureka, so it may be my new brand! ;-)

    Happy sucking to you too! Whoa! hee hee! 



I *hart* comments!


Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...