Tuesday, January 10, 2012

I'm Not That Kind Of Girl!

When I worked as a Controller in the auto industry, I went to lunch with clients, bank reps and my managers. One day I took my service manager and a customer to lunch. We just ran over to Eat ‘n Park, which was fine because they have a decent salad bar and I love rabbit food (lettuce).

 This customer was yakking away when I stood and told them that I was going to the salad bar and asked if either wanted anything. The customer, whom I had just met that day, said, “Yes, bring me back a kumquat.”

 I stood there for a second or two while my mind screamed, Why would you say that to me! What kind of depraved sex manic are you? But I didn’t say it out loud…thank goodness! I turned and headed for the salad bar and while I filled my plate I couldn’t get the word kumquat out of my mind or stop wondering why the customer would say such a disgusting thing to me. When I sat back down I couldn’t concentrate on the conversation because I thought I was sitting with a pervert. 

 Once I got back to the dealership, I called my secretary and told her I had an important question to ask.  So, as diplomatically as I could, considering what I thought were dire circumstances, I whispered into the phone, “What’s a kumquat?” 

 She calmly answered, “A fruit.” 

 “A fruit!” I squealed, “I thought it was some disgusting nic-name for a womanly body part!” I heard giggling on the other end of the phone and knew my secretary was in hysterics. I couldn’t blame her— it did sound quite silly…now. 

 I quickly told her what had transpired at lunch, but didn’t tell her what I had almost said to the guy! Which, by the way, I was so glad I hadn’t. 

 Can you just imagine the look on his face if I had shrieked, “You pervert! If you want a kumquat go get your own! I’m not that kind of girl!”



  1. Written on Tuesday, January 10, 2012 1:36m PM

    Hahahahahahaha! Too funny Pam! What a great story!

    1. Bubbe, aw yes, the good 'ole days! I need to write about them more!

  2. Written on Tuesday, January 10, 2012 8:52 PM

    Oh, that's funny! *giggling*

    (Do you prefer to be referred to as Pamela or Pam or something else entirely? You know, like Sweet Knees or Sugar Lips....not that I would actually refer to you that way, but still...it fits the question somewhat. Pardon my ramble...)

    1. Jo, it is funny...after the fact!

      Pam is fine, but Pamela sounds so regal and Pam-a-cakes is rather cute...just don't ask me for a friggin kumquat!

  3. Written on Tuesday, January 10, 2012 8:53 PM
    "A fruit!” I squealed, “I thought it was some disgusting nic-name for a womanly body part!”

    Bwhahahahahhahahahaha! OMG...I'm sitting here HOWLING at that, Pamela!

    That was PRICELESS!

    However, I have to tell you that I think the same way whenever I hear the word Kiwi's. It sounds like some disgusting nickname for certain "male parts."


    AWESOME post, my friend! Thanks for the great laugh!

    Hope you're having a terrific week!

    1. Oh Ron...kiwi's! Well, we could probably make a list of...er...names but let's NOT and say we did. This isn't supposed to be an X rated blog!


I *hart* comments!


Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...