Tuesday, November 8, 2011

The Adventures Of Motherhood

I read a Mommy Blog where the author said that blogging gave her better insight on how it felt to be a mommy who had a child throwing a temper tantrum in a store and rather than send nasty looks and think, Gosh, get that kid to shut the hell up already, she sent her looks of empathy and thought, I know how it feels, it’ll be okay.

I must admit, blogging is a wonderful device. After all, here I am, blogging. For me, though, motherhood offered more insight and compassion for other moms. ESPECIALLY those who have children that throw temper tantrums, or the ones, like my youngest that needed a leash.

My oldest son was the type of toddler that didn’t throw temper tantrums and actually LOVED shopping, little did I know he’d become a freaken shopaholic (lol). He was also the type of kidlet that did exactly what I told him. Don’t go in THAT cupboard (under the sink with cleaning supplies) it has yuckies in it and the child NEVER disobeyed! In my naïveté, I assumed ALL little tikes were similar to MY Dalan. Oh boy, was I in for a rude awakening.

When I saw kids leashed to their moms, I thought, That’s horrible! He’s NOT a freaken dog! Or Oh.my.gosh. What the hell’s wrong with her that she can’t keep track of her own kid!  Karma likes to give us wake up calls and so it did me when my Austin was born.

Austin rarely slept in the womb let alone after he was born. That boy came out ready to kick some ass. I had to call poison control when he was six months old because he actually knocked over a bottle of Clorox and somehow managed to OPEN the CHILD-PROOF lid and we found him lying in a puddle of freaken bleach! Needless to say, we called poison control TWO more times by the time he was TWO!

He didn’t walk until he was almost fourteen months old, but that was good thing, because once he started walking, he was HELL on two legs. It was then that I realized I NEEDED one of those horrible wonderful leashes. One day, at the mall, with my husband and other son, when I was checking out, I handed Austin a little toy from the counter to keep him busy while I wrote my check. I glanced down not twenty seconds later and he was GONE! I looked around…NO Austin. I asked my husband where he was…NO Austin. He wasn’t IN the store AT ALL! I immediately ran from the store into the mall hallway and began SCREAMING his name. NO Austin. How the hell did my two year old manage to disappear, not only from me, but my husband and seven year old, in less than twenty seconds flat!

I ran through the mall SREAMING his name. The other shoppers had to think I was a COMPLETE lunatic, which at that very moment, I was. I found him. By the mall ENTRANCE on the quarter riding machines! And get this—he had the toy from the store in his little hand! I wanted to strangle hug him, I was so relieved to see him. Which I did, hug him that is, even before my heart slowed to its normal rate of 70 bpm (that must’ve taken at least five minutes!). After that, when I saw moms with their child leashed to their arm, I would say or think, They have an Austin. 

Austin was (is) also as stubborn as my husband a mule. So stubborn, in fact, that he would (will) cut off his nose to spite his face. When he wanted something and I would tell him no, he would literally THROW himself onto the floor (concrete included) and SCREAM. Of course people would glare at me. At first I was embarrassed. There I stood with a toddler lying on the ground screaming that I was the worst mommy ever! I knew I couldn’t give in or he’d end up a holy terror. I would pick him up and TRY to proceed with shopping or checking out, but the SCOWLS were just as bad as his obnoxious behavior...err, maybe not so much. It was then that I decided that I would SHOW him.

Whenever he threw a hissy fit, I would stop whatever we were doing and LEAVE. Eating at a restaurant—pack up the food in to-go boxes. Shopping—leave the cart and go home. I left so many FILLED carts, I lost count. By the time we got home, Austin would tell me I was the best mommy ever, but we didn’t go back to the store/restaurant that day. I waited until Daddy got home and if I had been shopping, I went back—alone.

 I see plenty of kids throwing tantrums in stores; it’s what SOME kids do. HOW parents handle it is different in each case. I, after having lived it, however, don’t shoot dagger eyes (and mine are deadly according to my eldest) at moms with “Austin’s” anymore. I give them a kind smile, or even tell them, I know how it feels, mine is fourteen now, so it definitely gets much better. 

This isn’t an affront on my son; far from it. He was a rambunctious kidlet that taught me patience, perseverance and tolerance (three traits that did need major over-hauling). It’s amazing, really, when you think about it, we get exactly what we need, when we need it, whether we realize it or not.

Blogging is great, yes. I love it. However Motherhood—my sons, gave me more than I could ever express in a thousand blog posts.

 I’m forever in their debt and honored to be so.


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