911 Treated Me Like I’m Blonde—Never Mind That I Am
I called 911 and here’s the conversation:
911: What township or borough?
911: What’s your emergency?
Me: My son’s car broke down on Rte 8 and he has NO flashers. I have to get the vehicle towed…
911: We don’t tow vehicles ma’am
Me: **Sigh** I KNOW you don’t tow vehicles, BUT you DO direct traffic. And someone needs to get down there before there’s an accident because the vehicle is in the middle of the highway with NO flashers to warn other drivers that it's broken down. I’m calling the towing company now.
Are people really THAT stupid or are they practicing for comedy central?
I Don’t Spit But Will If It Pleases You
My husband turned and saw that his mug was still sitting where he left it. He picked it up but before taking a sip he asked me, “Did you spit in here?”
I was wiping off the counter with a dish cloth and answered, “No, do you want me to?”
Needless to say, I had to wipe coffee off the wall and cabinets because he ended up spitting the coffee he had in his mouth all over the place. Apparently he thought MY answer was hilarious.
I thought I was just being nice.
Please Mail The Pizza
So, my husband gave him a real quick lesson on HOW to order pizza to go.
Austin dialed the pizza shop and told them what we wanted. When it came time for our address information, Austin held the phone away from his mouth and asked, “Do I give them our zip code?”
My husband answered, “No, they aren’t mailing it.”