Wednesday, December 24, 2008

Happy Birthday Capricorn!

If you were born between December 22nd and January 20th, your sun sign is The Goat.

You are an Earth sign, which means you are level headed.

Women are always level headed, so this isn’t unusual.

You are a Cardinal sign, therefore you like to move and initiate action.

The way women move and initiate action on a daily basis, we must all be Cardinals.

You are persistent, scrupulous, conventional, and ambitious. However, on the negative side, you can be egotistical, critical, opinionated and pessimistic. You’re most compatible with Scorpions, Taureans and Pisces the Fish. Gemini and Leo are 2 signs you should probably steer away from.

Your color is Indigo. Elm is your tree. Musk is your perfume. Indian hemp is your plant. Oh goodie, nothing like an illegal plant for your sign. Don’t blame me, I didn’t invent astrology. And I sure don’t suggest you plant one!

Your gemstone is Garnet and lead is your metal. I’m going to go out on an Elm limb here and guess that lead isn’t going to be something a Cappy gal wants under her Christmas tree!

As she shakes her pretty wrapped present, “Honey, I hope there’s lead in here!” Be careful what you wish for-you may end up with a mechanical pencil.

The Goat and Ass are your animals.

I’m sure there are days when non-single Cappy Gals feel like they already have an Ass. I wonder if on those days, when our significant other turns into an Ass, we could trade him in. Is there a store that takes used Asses? We could go up to the counter and fill out a Trade-in Ass Form. This form will require us to list his flaws. Like doesn’t listen when we speak; but can hear a sports announcer in a wind tunnel. Doesn’t remember important dates; but knows every football, hockey and baseball stat since he was 10 years old. Is a big baby when sick; but will get a black eye and tell everyone how awesome it was. He can’t find his car keys, shoes or wallet; but knows where the remote is at all times. Misses the hamper with dirty clothes; but doesn’t miss the basketball hoop in the driveway with the basketball . The only problem with this store is you don’t want to trade, because then you’re just getting another woman’s Ass. So, you’re probably better off keeping the Ass you have. Patience comes in real handy when dealing with these creatures. Besides, they do have their good qualities, even if they don’t completely mature.

Fellow Capricorns: Diane Lane, Marlene Dietrich, Orlando Bloom, Jim Carrey and Elvis Presley

Capricorn Astrology Photo Compliments of: Kagaya Studio

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